I sent a letter to my friend. In between his first name and his surname on the cover, I had given him a nickname. He text me. My friend, not the nickname.
"Thank you for my package in the post today Laura, it made me very happy. I love that I am "The Fox", but I don't understand why."
"Because 'a fox' sounded too generic. So thus you are 'The Fox', as in definitive."
"I was rather more questioning the word 'fox' over the word 'the'."
"I thought 'really fucking hot' might upset the post office lady."
"Really? I heard she is a right saucy bitch. Mind riddled with filth."
I guess you need to see my post officer to know why I haven't slept in three days.