Me: I think you need a WWLD braclet to help successfully conduct your life without me.
Frenemy: I have no idea what that means. And if you are trying to spell BRACELET then I am so disappointed in you.
Me: WHAT WOULD LAURA DO? Like the What Would Jesus Do bracelets Christians have to get them through their days.
Frenemy: Oh! Okay then. I would wear it with pride. (Everytime I see a hot man... *has sex with them on a park bench*). Maybe the whole bracelet thing isn't such a good idea after all.
Me: I CAN'T BELIVE YOU JUST BROUGHT THAT UP.
Frenemy: I will continue to bring it up at any oppurtunity.
Me: It's spelt oppOrtunity. And I didn't have sex with him. I wanted to. But I didn't.
Frenemy: So you embarrassed yourself by being groped on a park bench and didn't even get laid? FAIL.
Me: I embarrassed myself and didn't even get laid. My life is a mess.
Frenemy: A proper shambles. You could be in America, publishing books and abusing your accent BUT NO, you're sat at home with a dozen cats fingering yourself.
It is at this point that I feel I need to say: I MISS MY FRIEND.